Breaking The Stigma: The Emotional Toll Of Divorce On Men

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, in 2021, the U.S. marriage rate was 14.9 marriages in the last year per 1,000 women, down from 16.3 a decade earlier. And the 2021 divorce rate dropped to 6.9 in the last year from 9.7 divorces per 1,000 women in 2011. In Maryland in 2021, there were 1.6 divorces per 1,000 inhabitants, the lowest divorce rate since 1990.

Neither spouse ever “wins” in divorce, but compared to women, the emotional impact of divorce on men often tends to be worse.

Men’s Loss Of Self-identity And Self-worth

In marriage, men often derive their sense of self-worth as husbands, fathers, and providers. The failure of their marriage can cause men to think they are utter failures.

When couples divorce, women, by nature, are more likely to have a support network of friends and family to rely on. A divorce law firm for men and women understands the challenges men face in divorce and will have a list of trusted resources, such as therapists and religious organizations, where men can seek emotional assistance.

Grieving Process Is Different For Men

Generally, women recognize the warning signs in the marriage before men do. If the problems are not resolved, women usually instigate the divorce. Men who did not expect to encounter divorce proceedings are surprised and confused, and they are unprepared for the subsequent feelings of inadequacy and frustration.

A divorce is the death of a marriage. Like all deaths, it must be grieved. It is normal for both parties to feel sorrow, resentment, depression, anger, fear, and shame following a divorce. Rather than work through the grieving process, men are more likely to isolate themselves and suppress their feelings, and possibly to substitute other methods to cope with the loss.

The toll of divorce on men can lead them to abuse alcohol and/or drugs, participate in other self-destructive behaviors, and entertain ideas of suicide. By entrusting Fait & DiLima divorce lawyers in Maryland with the legal process of their divorce, men can take the time to focus on their own personal healing.

Financial Stressors And Men’s Parental Role

There’s no getting around it: divorce changes family dynamics. Due to custody arrangements, men may have less access to their children. The separation from their children can trigger feelings of loss and guilt in men, along with a sense of disconnection. If a man’s ex-wife has primary custody of their children, the man may picture the children and his ex-wife as a unified team while he is alone and adrift.

While the impact of divorce on men and their parenting role is real, with robust legal and emotional support, men can successfully adjust to co-parenting and learn new ways to maintain a meaningful relationship with their children.

Furthermore, most men are confronted with the financial stress that arises from the obligations of child support, alimony payments, and property division. These responsibilities can cause financial strain, leading to feelings of anxiety and incompetence. Seeking professional advice from divorce attorneys can provide legal clarity and help men alleviate these concerns.

Steps Toward Healing

With proper help, men can prevent the mental strain of divorce from destroying their physical health. It is vital for men to share their feelings in order to process their grief and begin the journey toward healing. Men’s support groups can offer a way for men to connect with others who have gone through a divorce and come out the other side. Although there is no set schedule for the healing process, men who take the necessary time for self-reflection will discover new ways to adjust post-divorce. Eventually, they will find a sense of peace as they move forward with their lives, and benefit from the way Fait & DiLima, LLP handles their divorce.

Fait & DiLima, LLP: We Move Mountains for You

Does your impending divorce seem like an insurmountable obstacle? As this article has noted, divorce is a life-altering event that exacts a heavy emotional toll on men and women. Don’t attempt this journey on your own. Before searching online for a “divorce lawyer near me,” speak to the skilled attorneys at Fait & DiLima, LLP. Our legal team will provide you with strong representation and advocate fiercely for you in court. The testimonials of the clients whom we have assisted confirm our bold approaches and effective resolutions.

With more than 100 years of collective experience, our award-winning team has successfully represented men and women in thousands of divorce cases. Contact us today at (301) 251-0100 or complete our online form to schedule a consultation. Our offices are located in Rockville and Frederick. For your convenience, we also offer online meetings.

Copyright © 2023. Fait & DiLima, LLP. All rights reserved.

The information in this blog post (“post”) is provided for general informational purposes only and may not reflect the current law in your jurisdiction. No information in this post should be construed as legal advice from the individual author or the law firm, nor is it intended to be a substitute for legal counsel on any subject matter. No reader of this post should act or refrain from acting based on any information included in or accessible through this post without seeking the appropriate legal or other professional advice on the particular facts and circumstances at issue from a lawyer licensed in the recipient’s state, country, or other appropriate licensing jurisdiction.

Fait & DiLima, LLP
One Church St., Suite 800
Rockville, MD 20850
(301) 251-0100



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