Divorcing a Narcissist
Rockville, MD

At Fait & DiLima, our lawyers, who specialize in narcissist divorce, will guide you through the toxic conflicts involved in divorcing a narcissist. We manage your case so you can find peace of mind and security.

Disclaimer: When we use the terms “narcissist” or “narcissistic,” we don’t necessarily refer to a clinical diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. We mean a toxic personality style that tends toward manipulation, high conflict, arrogance, lack of empathy, and an inflated sense of entitlement. You may find this an odd part of a divorce discussion, but it occurs often enough to mention. 

Family law practices emphasize cooperation, positive communication and a peaceful approach during the divorce process. Unfortunately, this constructive and healthy attitude rarely works with a narcissistic person. Narcissists habitually manipulate, threaten, mislead, withhold information, and refuse to cooperate during a divorce. Mediation often fails, so these divorce cases usually end up in the courtroom.

While you may seek rationality and an orderly approach to minimize chaos in the proceedings, your spouse’s narcissism may complicate matters and make your case appear weak.

We can prepare you for recurring conflict and guide your responses to uncivil or extreme actions of your spouse. A narcissist’s behavior may be driven by perceived threats to their ego or their sense of superiority. They may react in extreme ways to make sure they win at all costs. They will not give up and they are often willing to manipulate the children, exploit and ruin shared relationships, and even harm both of your reputations in pursuit of their goals.

Divorcing a narcissist is a painful, confusing process riddled with emotional and financial pitfalls. Not only do you need to be psychologically prepared, but you need an attorney who is prepared to use firmness and the most effective legal solutions to negotiate the landmines. We will do our best to protect your finances, safeguard your children and seek to insulate you from trauma.

How do I prepare for divorce from a narcissistic spouse?

1. Seek legal advice. It’s important to have a clear understanding of your legal rights and options. A divorce attorney can help you navigate the legal process and protect your interests.
2. Gather important documents. Make sure you have copies of important financial documents, such as bank statements, tax returns, and property records. These will be helpful, especially if you and your spouse have joint assets.
3. Protect your emotional well-being. Divorce can be an emotionally taxing process, more so with a narcissistic spouse. Seek support from friends, family, and possibly a therapist.
4. Set boundaries. It’s important to establish boundaries with your spouse during the divorce process. This may involve limiting communication or setting ground rules for interactions.
5. Prepare for conflict. Narcissists can be confrontational and difficult to deal with, and it’s likely that the divorce process will involve some level of conflict. Try to stay calm and focused and consider seeking the assistance of a mediator or therapist if necessary.
6. Plan for the future. It’s important to have a clear plan in place for your future after divorce. This may involve making financial arrangements, finding a new place to live, or seeking support from friends and family.

Remember, it’s okay to ask for help and support during this difficult time. Don’t be afraid to seek out resources such as therapists, divorce attorneys, divorce coaches or support groups to help you through the process.

We can protect your rights if your spouse

• Makes false accusations to discredit you
• Siphons away marital funds or conceals assets
• Tries to turn your children against you
• Attempts to drag out the divorce process
• Threatens you or the outcome of the divorce in any way
• Gaslights you

HOW TO APPROACH MONEY MATTERS WHEN DIVORCING A NARCISSIST

Money is a sore issue in narcissistic divorces. Your spouse may use underhanded tactics like emptying joint accounts of funds, moving assets to offshore trusts, or dodging child support payments. Your situation will be even more difficult if your spouse was the main breadwinner and handled all the finances, leaving you in a dependent position.

To stay afloat financially, attempt to do all of the following prior to leaving or making your desire to divorce known:

• Identify and document all of your marital assets, including bank accounts, savings accounts, investment portfolios, and your mortgage information (so your spouse can’t, unbeknownst to you, pull equity out of the house by refinancing)
• Carefully monitor joint accounts, and be wary of unexpected or excessive activity on credit cards, even cards in just your name
• Open a bank account and a new credit card in your name and start depositing any income into your separate account. This way, you’ll have access to cash during the divorce process in case your spouse tries to deplete or block your access to joint accounts. But get advice from an attorney prior to doing this…
• Protect your non-marital assets. If you inherited real estate or received a substantial sum of money as a gift, keep your assets separate from your marital property.

PROTECTING CHILDREN FROM NARCISSISM

Sharing a child with a narcissist can be a nightmare, especially during a divorce. Your spouse may resort to manipulation and lies to sabotage your relationship with your child.

To protect yourself and your child:

• Be careful when talking about your co-parent. Even if they try to turn your children against you, avoid bad mouthing them.
• Try to keep things normal. Be the anchor of stability in your children’s lives by keeping up any usual, healthy activities like after school outings, hobbies, and meeting friends.
• Document everything, including your spouse’s toxic behavior, from threatening texts to evidence of parental neglect. This information can be especially useful in a custody battle.
• Notify your attorney if your spouse acts in a way that may pose a violent threat to you or your children. It may be necessary to pursue a protective order to ensure a secure and safe environment.

When you’re in the throes of a narcissistic divorce, it may seem like the struggle will never end. The following tips can help you and your family to pull through this difficult time:

• Minimize contact with your spouse.
• Use brief, straightforward, self-explanatory texts when you need to exchange information, and save the texts. Let us handle all communications about the divorce process.
• Protect your children from toxic situations as much as you can.
• Maintain a support system of people who do not enable your spouse’s narcissistic behavior.
• Stay off social media.
• If your spouse is running a smear campaign against you, ignore it, but document any false allegations.

Our Experienced Narcissist Divorce Attorneys Can Prepare You For The Fight Ahead

At Fait & DiLima, we will use effective legal solutions to negotiate with your narcissistic spouse, protect your finances, and safeguard your children while seeking to insulate them from trauma. We aim to help you secure peace of mind during your divorce and help you move on to a brighter chapter of your life.

Contact our narcissist divorce legal team today to schedule a consultation in Rockville, MD. Let our experience be your guide.